A Tree of Christmas Love

I recently heard two friends say they did something different this year with their Christmas trees. Instead of having a tree with matching colors, ornaments, or themed ornaments, they each decorated their tree with ornaments that brought back memories. I couldn't help thinking about our tree and the joy it brings me. 

I love my Christmas tree. It’s a memory in and of itself. My husband and I bought it the first year we were married, at a garage sale in August. He said it was too early to think of Christmas, but I knew that for a couple of newlyweds who needed to be frugal, a $3.00 Christmas tree, including the stand, was a good deal.

Believe it or not, almost every year since then, I have set up that tree, with its two, pole-like sticks as a trunk, and branches of varying lengths that slide into holes in the trunk, some of which don’t fit as snugly as before. Then I add small, almost bracelet-like greenery that fits around the trunk to hide the pole and make the tree look real. I think it’s beautiful, once it’s loaded with multicolored lights and lots of ornaments.

My kids still laugh and almost groan when they see the tree we still use, over three decades later. They comment about how spindly it looks and how they can see right through it, but I figure that it lets in more light from the window AND I can see the ornaments hanging all the way through to the back of the tree!! There are more ornaments to see!

Every year, I top the tree with the yellow, construction-paper star with gold glitter that my oldest child made in Sunday school when she was three. I lovingly hang up two, small wooden ornaments – two angels singing and a wooden, red cardinal – both gifts from my beloved grandmother who passed away, five days before Christmas, when I was twelve. There are other favorite ornaments such as the ones celebrating our older two children’s first Christmases, with fabric-covered bulbs showing pictures of snow and young children, or the ornament for our youngest son’s fifth Christmas, with a Teddy bear and two candy canes sticking out of a Christmas stocking.

My husband and I have special ornaments, too - a woman wearing a fancy dress and her motoring hat, sitting in a green, wooden car; a man with a mustache, suit, and his motoring cap, sitting in his red car; a round, wooden ornament with an old-fashioned car in the middle, with the year of our second Christmas, as husband and wife; and a Papa Bear and Mama Bear, hugging, as the Papa Bear kisses her cheek, with the words, "I Love My Honey!"

I enjoy placing several angels on our tree, including a few handmade by friends; a ceramic bell that actually rings; and a girl on a swing from a Hallmark employee  who enjoyed seeing me come to the store with my little, curly-headed daughter in a stroller, many times, and gave the ornament to my daughter, as a gift. There are also the first Christmas bulbs we bought for our tree – bright red, unbreakable, fabric-covered bulbs. When our first child helped us decorate the tree, she placed all four of her bulbs on one branch that she could easily reach. Oh, that tree is filled with so many memories!

Over the years, ornaments have been added that remind us of special memories of when our children were growing up at home. There are the ornaments the kids made at school, including: pictures of our third child and a classmate, framed with toothpicks; a candy cane made out of beads; and baked dough in cookie-cutter shapes. A friend gave me a handmade, triangular-shaped, yarn ornament of a knitted face that says, “Squeeze me.” When you squeeze the cheeks, you see a chocolate, candy kiss inside. My uncle made us three, beautiful wooden ornaments that he intricately cut with his a scroll saw in the shapes of a manger scene, a bell, and an ornate ornament. I treasure those ornaments made with love for us. I smile as I think of the many other special ornaments we hang on our tree each year.

Yes, that tree is filled with memories and I shall always enjoy seeing it, year after year. In fact, sometimes, I’ve left it up until Easter, or once, for an entire year. I enjoy remembering the love of God and others for me and for my family, and the love God gives us to share with others – a love so deep and wide that it fills us to overflowing with His Spirit of Love, through faith in His Son, Jesus Christ, who lived and died so that we may know that, together with Christ, we, too, will also rise again, from life on earth, through faith in the One who made this all possible – the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit - one God, who calls us to be one in love with Him in spirit, and with one another, as well. I can’t think of any gift greater than that, except for His people sharing that amazing gift and spirit of love with others!

I wish you and your loved ones a very happy and blessed Christmas! Happy Holidays, too!! God bless you all!!

Precious Linda, c. 2014

I Wish I Could Die!

I wish I could die and not feel all this pain.

I wish I could fly over rocky road shame.

I wish I could never be trampled on again.

I wish I could end it! When will my life end?

I’m helpless, it’s true! It makes me feel blue.

Yellow-bellied, lily-livered, through and through.

My life is a waste. Don’t tell me, “Somehow,

It’s worth it to live and I’ll take a bow.”

My parents don’t love me; they don’t seem to care.

I feel like an orphan or soiled underwear. 

My friends are too busy, or don’t really know why

I avoid them, and tremble; and then, I just sigh.

Others in this world have it better than me.

Some others have it worse - a lot worse, I see.

Perhaps I’m in the middle of the “Yuck-o-Meter” now.

I wonder if I can find my way out of this, somehow.

I've heard it said in the really Good Book:

Sometimes you need to stop, and just take a look

At what’s really around you, and not too far

From the place you are standing, just where you are.

It needs to be okay to be where you are.

You've come a long way, so follow your Star.

I can’t find it! I can’t see! It’s way too dark for me!

Then turn on a light, or follow One closely.

It really doesn't matter; just get on the move

To become unstuck and to find your groove!

My breathing has settled; I’m much calmer, you know.

There was so much pent-up energy, I had to let go!

I thank you, profusely, for letting me vent;

I hope I didn't ding you up, or give you a dent.

Sometimes my emotions and feelings go wild.

It truly wasn't easy for me, as a child.

Sometimes, I get triggered and really confused,

Mixing past hurts and present ones, with similar cues.

For now, I will breathe, and relax for a while,

Sit down, and enjoy a much calmer lifestyle.

And then, I will get up and realize somehow

That I am a bit different; I do not know how.

I’m glad I took time to listen to me.

I’m no longer the same; I’m happier, you see,

‘Cause I've made it past another big hurdle today.

With practice, it will be easier, come what may.

Precious Linda, c. 2014

I slightly edited and revised this poem and posted it here on November 7, 2014.

Take It or Leave It – Truth is a Choice – PG 13 - Finding Light in Unusual Places

I've been a prick… a finger-pointing, judgmental, a$$h0le… a “chip off the old block”… a “goody-two-shoes” who has lived a façade or in an internal prison for most of my life. I’m “coming out”… not in the current, cultural way that it usually means… but I’m tired of living in an internal prison, locked within my old mindsets, my old ways of doing things and thinking. Perhaps you could liken it to a very, very, VERY belated “teenage rebellion” which, for me, while living at home, was equivalent to annihilation and the only way I could survive was to go under… hidden… for fear of what would happen, if I didn't.

Oh, yes, there’s been the church-going, Bible-believing, praying part of me, too. And, yes, I truly believe there is an awesome God who loves… others… and I've tried to believe He loves me, too, but when you've lived underground for so long, it’s sometimes hard to believe there is a place called, “Daylight.” I've been seeing shimmers of that “Light” and love and care and kindness in some most extraordinary ways.

Believe it or not, I have found a community of kind people, who welcome me as part of a family, in an online, model car club. It’s uncanny what a kind word or a thank you can mean to me. It’s weird to truly build relationships of trust with other people who I don’t even know and to believe they aren’t going to hurt me… at least, not intentionally. I learn from them that, even when life isn’t a bunch of roses, and the thorns in life “hurt like hell,” life goes on. Many live with internal or external pain or disabilities or difficult life situations, and yet, they each find a way to go on with their lives and be encouraging and kind to one another. This is new for me, and I’m sitting here in tears, letting the pain of living in an internal prison of fear and survival be released, as I realize, that this is how life has been for me, but there’s more to life, beyond the pain, beyond the fear, beyond the internal prison, I have lived in for years - for decades, in fact.

This morning, I saw the following “poster pic,” posted by a Facebook friend, and it really made me begin to think about how I've been living in an “internal prison.”

After I pondered it and thought about how it applied to me, I wrote:

“I believe this is true, but for me, it sounds easier said than done. Instead of being in a literal prison, I have sometimes felt as if I were in an internal prison. Internal ones are a bummer!”

After that, I saw this, which caught me by surprise and I had to think about it for a while, too:

 After thinking about it for a while, I wrote a response that surprised even me!

“What an interesting quote! I always thought that I enjoyed sharing love, joy, and encouragement with others because it felt and was good,  for me and the other person, and it was kind, but now I can also see how not experiencing those things or experiencing much negativity and disrespect has given me a reason to share the opposite with others. Thanks for the interesting quote!”

 Then, I was “hit” with another one that took some moments to “wrap my head, heart, and soul” around.

Again, I wrote a response that surprised me, but it’s the truth, I believe:

“Wow! You have some very interesting quotes here! I've never looked at life this way, probably because I'd rather forget the ‘not so nice stuff’ but perhaps this is true! Thanks for giving me much to ponder! “

After this, I was in tears.

Someone touched my heart in areas that have been bruised and hurt, with lovingkindness and gentle humor, with silly things, like this:

or:

 Of course, I laughed and smiled. Someone cared enough to send me these personalized messages. Many members of the model car club community joined in to participate at my impromptu birthday party at the make-believe location where we have cruise nights, drag races, and fun at the campground, lake, mud hole, etc.  They joined in with stories of their own, cruised by in their cool cars, or told stories about car keys being stolen by a large monkey, who eventually finished up all the food in the picnic area!

I began looking at inspirational quotes online, and more tears just kept flowing and flowing - from places of deep and hidden pain and darkness, tucked away “for posterity” but now, finally finding a way to be released - with a good release of pent-up, unnamed and unprocessed feelings from long ago, that have waited for the right time to be felt. These feelings began to flow and release me from the dark prison in which I have found myself.

I found inspirational quotations (*) such as:

“Life is so much brighter when we focus on what truly matters…”

“Pay no attention to those who talk behind your back, it only means that you’re two steps ahead of them.”

“Your life is a result of the choices you make… If you don’t like your life it is time to start making better choices.”

“Pain makes you stronger. Tears make you braver.  Heartbreak makes you wiser. So thank the past for a better future.”

And other quotations (**) such as:

“The tallest oak in the forest was once just a little nut that held its ground.”

“Believe you can & you’re halfway there.” – Theodore Roosevelt

“To strengthen the muscles of your heart, the best exercise is lifting someone else’s spirit whenever you can.” – Dodinsky (NOTSALMON.COM)

“You don’t always need a plan. Sometimes you just need to breathe, trust, let go and see what happens.” – Mandy Hale

“Your opinion is not my reality” – Dr. Steve Maraboli

“Stars can’t shine without darkness.”

“If your dreams don’t scare you, they aren’t big enough.”

“Pain doesn’t just show up in our lives for no reason.  It’s a sign that something in our lives needs to change.”

“Let your faith be bigger than your fear.”

“You are only confined by the walls you build yourself.” [OOPS!! This sounds like what I have been writing about!! The internal, prison walls!!]

“Whatever you believe about yourself on the inside is what you will manifest on the outside.” [OOOOHHH!! Interesting!!]

Thank you to all who have been part of my healing process. Yes, my healing will continue, but with friends who love me and care about me, just as I am; there’s nothing better. Interestingly, I have rarely found this type of friendship at “church.” Yes, “birds of a feather, flock together” but as another friend mentioned recently, some of us just “don’t fit” into the current, regular mold. In fact, since we are ALL unique, there truly isn't another person, just like you or just like me.

I’m going to spend the rest of my life, getting to know me and letting you get to know me, too! And, I will do my best to show acceptance and compassion towards you and your uniqueness, too!

Precious Linda

I originally wrote this in July 2014, and will change the date of this post, in a couple weeks, to reflect the date I completed it.

I have decided to share this piece with you, my blog readers, as a way of sharing my life experiences, learning, struggles, and journey.

I hope you enjoyed the uplifting quotes and poster pics, too!

I rated this writing as PG13 because of some of the language.

Precious Linda (2014-11-26)

CREDITS:

The first three poster pics are from: https://www.facebook.com/inspiring.posts/timeline.

The cat picture can be seen at: https://fbcdn-sphotos-h-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xpa1/v/t34.0-12/10564613_1444446125819244_1780294187_n.jpg?oh=61ef57754d1169918a1603f43a3900c9&oe=54788444&__gda__=1417187093_e6dc03500b18dd2062eaf2342659d153

The photo with the flower that was eaten can be seen at: https://fbcdn-sphotos-h-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xpf1/v/t34.0-12/10581366_1444707382459785_1396412739_n.jpg?oh=061bda08dcc0c7483efb2ff1662fb406&oe=5478EA5E&__gda__=1417216746_c767b1f78738b67811e94dfe4d15f253.

(*) The first set of quotations is from: https://www.google.com/search?q=inspirational+quotes+about+life&tbm=isch&imgil=CBKgfujxynqL5M%253A%253Bhttps%253A%252F%252Fencrypted-%20tbn0.gstatic.com%252Fimages%253Fq%253Dtbn%253AANd9GcRRO2eksBnegtflOeLAbOkRJ1NMwquHHPlrWNN0HJGYah1S_2UIcA%253B660%253B660%253BXmHUslchBMPYMM%253Bhttp%25253A%25252F%25252Frishikajain.com%25252F2012%25252F04%25252F08%25252Flife-quote-2%25252F&source=iu&usg=__44g7lPZ6iFLvAuLHPZP8lX942ls%3D&sa=X&ei=DpzPU9Zkxe2gBIb3goAD&sqi=2&ved=0CDEQ9QEwAQ&biw=1232&bih=870#facrc=_&imgdii=_&imgrc=CBKgfujxynqL5M%253A%3BXmHUslchBMPYMM%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Frishikajain.com%252Fwp-content%252Fuploads%252F2012%252F05%252F417306_279654318770491_266307820105141_599462_1302102688_n2.jpg%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Frishikajain.com%252F2012%252F04%252F08%252Flife-quote-2%252F%3B660%3B660

(**) The second set of quotations is from: http://www.dumpaday.com/random-pictures/inspirational-quotes-week-32-pics-2/

This was originally written on July 23, 2014 and published on this blog on November 11, 2014 at 7:52 p.m. Today, December 14, 2014, I will list it as published on July 23, 2014. 

Encouraging Poster Pics!

I've come across many "poster pics" on fb that I find encouraging and thought-provoking. I'd like to share a few that I found today at: Words of Wisdom, along with some comments and additional links. Enjoy!!

Poster Pic 1 - Learn to Love
This poster pic reminds me of a story about thorns and being thankful for the thorns in our lives. If you wish to read it, you can read it here: Thankful for the Thorns

 

 Poster Pic 2 - God will never leave you empty.
This reminds me that God loves us and knows what's best for us. If He asks us to let go of something, or even chooses to "prune" us, it's because He has something better in mind for us and for those whose lives we touch. God knows how to give the perfect gifts to us.

Poster Pic 3 - Searching
What a great reminder that I am the only one who can make changes in my life.

Poster Pic 4 - 7 Rules of Life
It's taken me quite a while to learn these rules. Some of them, I'm still learning. Even so, I believe they are all true.

Poster Pic 5 - The Best Place in the World
What an amazing and special place to be.

Poster Pic 6 - Actions Speak Louder Than Words

This is a great reminder of how what we think is not seen and our actions speak louder than words. It also reminds me that "faith without works is dead." I need to be sure my words and actions and thoughts are the same and coming through in my interactions with others.

Poster Pic 7 - I am Your Parent
I believe this is true of GRANDPARENTS, as well! :)

Poster Pic 8 - Beautiful Has Nothing To  Do With Looks
I like this saying. If someone knows that they are loved, they will be more open to listening to another and even, perhaps, look to them as a role model or mentor. These types of people, those who love us and we know we are accepted by them, no matter what, are remembered forever... just like my grandmother who died when I was twelve. Since love never ends, I know her love continues for me, too!

Poster Pic 9 - Faith is Taking the First Step 
Sometimes, I can be afraid to take the next step... in doing something new or in doing what I need to do. Interestingly, when I take that "one step," it opens up a whole new set of steps and opportunities that I didn't have before! Although, I don't necessarily know where my "first step" or the next one will lead to, I can take those steps with that God know where they lead. If I follow His lead or His "still, small voice," I know He will be there beside and within me, giving me the strength and wisdom to do what He asks of me and "make my path straight." I hadn't really thought that "just one step" can also be a step of faith, when we don't know where we are going or what will happen. Even so, the Lord is with me and also with you, if we just acknowledge and trust Him.

Poster Pic 10 - Friends That are Like Family
On days when my family seems distant or far away, it's nice to know that friends who love me and show me trust, honesty, love, and respect are truly "family" to me and will always be family to me! Thank you to those of you who are friends like that to me!

Poster Pic 11 - 8 Things to Give Up
This is a great reminder of things to give up... not necessarily" just for Lent" or for a season, but in order to be a healthy, integrated self. I'm still learning how to "give up" these things and probably will always need to make conscious choices to choose to think differently. I think it would also be helpful for me to replace these choices with confidence, thankfulness, courage, encouragement, affirmations, making decisions and moving on, humility, and self-awareness and acceptance.

Poster Pic 12 - The Most Beautiful People
Oftentimes, we do not know the stories behind the lives of people, even when we think we know the person well, and the struggles and difficulties they have gone through or are going through. This poster pic reminds me of a poetic story, The Most Beautiful Flower, by Cheryl Costello-Forshey. It has an unexpected twist that I think will touch your heart. May you find it beautiful, too, and may you find yourself, becoming more and more beautiful on the inside, as well! You can read it at: "The Most Beautiful Flower" and other poems, too!

Well, that's all for now! I hope you enjoyed these poster pics with me!

Precious Linda

Clichés and Half-Baked Truths

A lot of sayings have been passed on from generation to generation. Many have nuggets of truth and wisdom.  Others, however, are only partially true or not true at all.  Perhaps someone has encountered a “dumb blonde,” once in a while, but it certainly doesn’t mean that all blondes are like those depicted in the “dumb blonde jokes.”  

One saying I have heard and used is, “Parents have eyes in the back of their heads!” Yes, parents do have a way of knowing things that go beyond what they can see with their own two eyes. They hear things and listen well to the words between what is said or they watch the body language or facial expressions of a person.

Even so, as I contemplated talking with a friend about things I’d rather not remember, things that might fall under the category of family secrets, I found myself saying, “I can’t say anything about what I feel or think.”

“Why not?” she asked?

“Because parents have eyes in the backs of their heads,” I replied.

She looked at me and asked, “Is that true?”

“No,” I answered.

“Are they here?”

“No,” I answered, again.

“So, they won’t know unless you tell them or I do. I won’t and it’s your choice, if you tell them.”

She was right. Parents do not have eyes in the back of their heads, so some clichés, although partially true, may not be true at all!

Precious Linda, c. 2014.

Happy Easter and Merry Christmas!!

Without Christmas, there is no Easter. That’s why I still have a brightly-lit Christmas tree sitting in my living room. This year, its 1 1/2 feet tall. It reminds me that Jesus came to this earth as a baby, to be the Light of the world, to show us the way to His Heavenly Father-God. Not only that, He came to set us free from the ongoing lies of the evil one… thoughts in our minds that gnaw at us, day and night, trying to keep us from believing the One who can actually rescue us from those lies that drag us down to the depths of despair, loneliness, bitterness, unforgiveness, like heavy weights and baggage hanging around our necks, ankles, or carried in our hands or on our backs.

 Jesus came… not just to die... but also to live, to show us a way to live above and beyond our circumstances, to give us hope and life, not just for this life, but with our Father-Creator who longs for us to return home to Him… to a place of love, without judgment, to a place of love that redeems us and has paid the ransom for believing and trusting the one who is a liar, instead of the One who is Truth.

I look at this small, Christmas tree and remember God’s amazing love… to send His only begotten Son, not made or created, but the very essence of Himself… to live in this world, which is being assaulted with the lies of the evil one. God's Son came to bring us Truth… the message and hope of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, and self-control. Not only that, but to those who believe that He is truly the Son of God and the Son of Man, the One who came to free us from the bondage and yoke of constant, fruitless unbelief…He has come to break those chains and set us free, once and for all. He offers us the gift of the Spirit of Life, of Love, of forgiveness and mercy… to truly give us life… eternal life, through the power of the resurrected Christ, a gift to us, the Holy Spirit who lives and dwells in each one who believes that Jesus Christ, came to bring us out of living in darkness to the place of living in Light, eternal life with Him!

May you enjoy a blessed Easter, as you celebrate Christmas, whether it’s today or tomorrow or years from now. I pray that this will truly be a day of joy, deep, deep within your heart and soul, not just on the day you say or said, “Yes!” to Christ, but every single moment of every day, that you, too, acknowledge the Power and Presence of His Spirit with you, within you, comforting and directing you, and doing what you could never imagine, in and through You!

May the peace of the Lord Jesus Christ be with you, now and always!! Amen!

Happy Easter and Merry Christmas!

Hallelujah! The LORD is RISEN!!

He is Risen, indeed!!

Precious Linda, c.2014

Sitting next to my little Christmas tree is the painting from my friend. To learn why it’s sitting there and what it means to me, you can read my previous post at: http://twowhitebutterflies.blogspot.com/2013/03/two-white-butterflies-watercolor.html.

You may also wish to see y Christmas tree and what I wrote last Easter at: http://twowhitebutterflies.blogspot.com/2013/03/happy-easter.html. 

I Saw Something Funny about Easter Eggs, Today!

I know Easter eggs have nothing to do with the true meaning of Easter (unless it's an empty one), but the "poster pic" shown below hit me as FUNNY!! 

The "rules" in our family have always been to hide eggs (plastic) such that they can be seen from "one angle!" Each person has their own color of eggs to find so they can remain in the game, without their eggs being picked up by someone else. We adjust the "challenge" to the age and ability of the person. Every year, it's a challenge to hide eggs for those "young-at-heart" people who still love to find eggs... including me!

The picture and idea shown above would truly be a challenge!! It reminds me of doing puzzles that are all yellow pencils or a scene of trees in the fall, bursting with one shade of brilliant yellow, or maybe a puzzle with a picture of marbles. Maybe this hunt would be like "Where's Waldo?" except he would be masquerading as a white ghost or something. 

For those of you who are tired of seeing "white" on the ground and are wondering when winter will be over, maybe you can have fun with this idea!!

I wish you all much love, joy, and peace in your hearts and lives, at this Easter-time, and always.

I wish a Happy and Blessed Easter to those who believe Jesus rose from the dead and offers new life to those who believe in Him, as Lord and Savior! For all of you, I wish you much joy, peace, and love, always!!

Precious Linda, c. 2014

I found the "poster/pic" shown above on Facebook at: https://www.facebook.com/353739560014/photos/a.10151237768610015.797948.353739560014/10154038860095015/?type=1&relevant_count=1.

Phantom Pain

Once.

I was.

There.

Hurt. Bewildered. Terror-filled.

No more. Never again.

My body freezes. Remembering.

My thoughts cannot. Remember.

Tension. Debilitating fear!

My heart beats faster and faster.

Neon lights of fear, flash

ON & off, ON & off, ON

in a body

that

cannot

connect

body

memories

to

my

conscious

brain.

My body remembers the past,

my mind does not,

triggering unconscious fears,

pain, and shame.

Neon lights of fear, flash

ON & off, ON & off, ON.

warning me, telling me

of phantom pain;

throbbing, itching,

painful feelings

of what was once there,

but is no more.

Neon lights of fear, flash

ON & off, ON & off, ON.

Phantom memories

surviving, surface.

Gripping pain

holds on, tightly.

The pain remains,

feelings freeze.

The neon lights of fear, flash

ON & off, ON & off, ON

until others mirror the loss,

my brain gently accepts.

Shame

shifts

burps

puffs

snips,

bursting

heavy,

dark

clouds,

thundering

downpours.

The neon lights begin to flicker

ON & off, On & off, on

OFF.

My body relaxes.

My heart purrs.

I am free, once again,

to be at peace.

Precious Linda, c. 2014

Remembering Two, Great Men!!

I was surprised when I heard what people said about two men who died, ten years apart; one was almost 75 and the other had just turned 18. Both were well-loved, by those who knew them personally, and, also, by people around the world whose lives had been touched by them. The comment I heard about each man was: “When you were with him, he treated you, as if you were the most important person in the world.” When I heard the tribute for the second time, it struck my heart and touched me deeply, as something remarkable. I realized that both of these men had touched and changed my life, as well, even though I had never met either of them.

One man was Fred Rogers, best known as the television producer and host of Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood which ran for many years and continues to be seen on Public Television. He was a caring, compassionate man who encouraged children (and their parents, too!) to accept their feelings and uniqueness and to know they are loved, just as they are. He was also an educator, minister, songwriter, and author. The other, Zach Sobiech, is a lesser known man who, at the age of fourteen, learned that he had osteosarcoma, a bone cancer that usually develops in teenagers, when they are growing rapidly. He continued to live his life as fully as possible for the next four years, while undergoing 10 surgeries and 20 rounds of chemotherapy. Toward the end of his life, his mom suggested that he might like to write letters to his family members to remember him, after he passed on. Instead, he chose to write and sing songs. One of his songs, Clouds, became a hit song that has touched the hearts of people around the world. Although Zach's life was short, as compared to most others, he, too, left an amazing legacy of showing compassion and care for others, treating each person and oneself with respect, and living life to the fullest. Through various celebrations of Zach’s life, money is raised to fund osteosarcoma research for children.

I am glad I was able to enjoy and appreciate Mr. Rogers’ kind and gentle ways of interacting with his TV audience, when my children were younger, and being encouraged to love myself and others, as unique and special human beings. It was also nice to know that Fred Rogers was the same off-screen as he was on-screen. Although I never met Zach Sobiech, I see his spirit, heart, and humble personality shine through, as I watch him on YouTube videos, singing his songs and interacting with his family and friends. I appreciate his compassion for others, his joy in living life to the fullest, and making every day count.

I am grateful for the ways in which Fred Rogers and Zach Sobiech each used their time on earth to show compassion for others, to be gentle, but strong leaders by example, and for encouraging each of us to live our lives fully, doing whatever we know how to do and sharing it, as a gift of love, hope, and respect for the people in the world around us... beginning with… one person at time!

My favorite links about Fred Rogers include:

15 Quotes that Show That Mr. Rogers was a Perfect Human Being - http://www.buzzfeed.com/daves4/quotes-that-show-that-mr-rogers-was-a-perfect-human-being

10 Mr. Rogers Quotes You Need to Read - http://www.relevantmagazine.com/culture/10-mr-rogers-quotes-you-need-read

A very fast & fun explanation of 35 fun facts about Mr. Rogers – “35 Facts About Mr. Rogers – mental floss (Ep. 2) - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Xck2ByutMg

My favorite links about Zach Sobiech include:

The video, “My Last Days: Meet Zach Sobiech” especially from 1:04 – 1:19 minutes and 21:57 – 22:08 minutes on the link: Zach Sobiech, 18-Year-Old ‘Clouds’ Singer, Leaves The World An Incredible Legacy - http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/05/21/zach-sobiech-18yearold-cl_n_3312838.html (There is other information and videos on this link, also.)

Zach’s family and friends lip-sync his song, Clouds, on a video collage, as a gift to him. See “My Last Days: Zach Sobiech ‘Clouds’ Celebrity Music Video” at: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7zxXAtmmLLc.

Thousands of Minnesotans Sing Zach Sobiech’s ‘Clouds’ at MOA - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r2O1ZPeexcs  (NOTE: MOA is the Mall of America in Bloomington, MN.)

POSTSCRIPT, WRITTEN ON MARCH 21, 2014:
I didn't realize why I sensed such a strong desire to write and post this on my blog yesterday about two, great men. I learned today that it was Fred Rogers' birthday yesterday (March 20th)! Isn't that rather uncanny? I also like what a friend posted today about Mr. Rogers. See: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10152244333450256&set=a.204442570255.129097.55715345255&type=1&relevant_count=1

Losing a Ton!!

I’ve been a pack rat for years, decades, in fact, and my friend came up with the idea of joining together with twenty people such that each person had the same goal of getting rid of ten pounds each day for ten days. At the end of 10 days, we, as a group would have lost a ton!

My friend offered great ideas and suggestions. She suggested that we save a location to work on that would be easy to get rid of ten pounds in a day, for a day when we might not be feeling well or were too busy. She encouraged us to wait until we could find ten consecutive days before we started. She shared a list of sites that would take clothing, electronics, food, baby clothes, household furniture, household items, and other things. She also included some encouraging articles about simplifying, streamlining, and getting rid of items we no longer needed or wanted.

I started this in January and got rid of or set aside over 124 pounds of clothes, household items, items I would “look at someday,” old food, food I purchased but no longer planned to use, Christmas tree lights that no longer worked, old telephone books, an unopened box with hanging files for a file drawer, a small lamp, a stash of plastic containers that I had saved for years, etc. It was wonderful to finally get rid of things I no longer needed or used and finding places to give the new or gently-used items to people who would enjoy or appreciate them.

I especially liked the daily focus – 10 pounds. That was it. The goal of ten pounds allowed me to have a limit so I could stop and leave something for the following day, without spending the whole day on this project. I also liked the encouragement and camaraderie and helpful tips shared by other group members on the private fb group of “Lose a Ton!” I didn’t feel like I was doing this alone. Some people posted, before and after pictures that were encouraging. Others shared an area they were working on – the refrigerator or freezer, under their bed, their VHS, DVD, or book collection, sheet music, their kitchen cupboards, under the sink - that spurred some of us on to do the same.

Interestingly, after my ten days were over, I was enjoying this so much that I chose to continue, for another fourteen days. My friend said, “As long as you’re on a roll, keep going!” After that, I took off some Sundays. I even lowered the number of pounds per day, knowing I could always get rid of more.

Another group member wrote and said, “It’s kind of addicting.” She’s right… I am actually looking forward to cleaning up areas in my home which have been packed tightly to accommodate more and more. No more!

And, what do you know? I may even lose a ton on my own!

Precious Linda, c. 2014

Postscript:

I completed my ten days in January. Since I began, I’ve gotten rid of or set aside over 478 pounds!! The “set-aside” items will go towards a couple’s upcoming rummage sale to raise funds for the adoption of their first baby. This has been a great start for me.

I’ve slowed down a bit. I think I especially liked the group idea, effort, and encouragement. I also noticed that working on this project for ten, consecutive days, helped keep me focused on “looking” for items around the house for what I could get rid of, rather than my normal way of overlooking something, even as I walked right past it.

As the rummage sale gets closer, I will probably start up again so I can end with a “grand finish!” (Or, is that two grand?) Maybe, I actually WILL lose a ton, on my own!!

Held in the Palm of His Hand

I came out to the living room this morning, preparing to sit and write in my favorite chair, when I saw the figurine a friend lent me yesterday, sitting on the round table next to my chair. 

My eyes teared up with joy and delight, a surprise to my system and being, as I thought of God’s love for me, that He holds me such that nothing can ever snatch me out of His hand and, also, as I thought of my friend’s expressions of compassion for me, knowing that her thoughts are with me, wishing me the best, even when we aren't together.

As I gently picked up the small figurine and held it in my hand, I pictured and sensed the Lord, holding me lovingly, cradling me in His hands and arms and heart, with the love of a mother or grandmother for her beloved child or grandchild.

Lord, may I never lose sight of this thought, belief, and sense of knowing that you will always hold me close in the palm of Your hand.

I love You, Lord! Forever! Amen!

Linda

The bottom of this figurine is printed with the following:

Palm of My Hand

See!

I will not

forget you…

I have carved

you on the palm

of my hand.

Isaiah 49:15

c. 1983, Roman, Inc.

See also Isaiah 49:15-16 and the verse I was thinking about: John 10:28-29.

You can find these verses at: http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Isaiah+49%3A15-16&version=NIV and http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=john+10:28-29.

If I told the truth...

If I told the truth...

I'd have to face my fears...

I’d have to accept whatever happened to me as real life, ugly and unbelievable as it was.

I’d have to find a way to accept my past, my parents, and others who hurt me or neglected me.

I’d have to own up to being not quite there… here… in the moment.

I’d have to come to the point of knowing that TRUTH hurts – it damn well hurts and the past cannot be re-written, and yet, in some ways, it can because, it’s over and will never happen again, to me, as it did happen to me, as a child.

If I told the truth, even to myself, I’d need to show compassion to the young parts of me that got stuck in their development and, basically, love and accept them and show tenderness to them. I’d need to forgive the evildoers and those who did wrong to me and harmed me.

If I told the truth, I would need to accept myself as I am, here and now, and do what I need to do to help myself, all of me, grow up in the ways God intended and intends for me.

If I told the truth? No, I will tell the truth and am continuing to tell the truth. I will grow up!!

Precious Linda, c. 2013

This was written last fall, while in a class, "The Lost Art of Personal Writing - Finding Your Voice," with the prompt of: "If I told the truth."